We all have fear. The question is what are we afraid of? We often confuse the fear of failure with the real fear. We are terribly afraid of success, afraid of what we may have to leave behind.
Fear of Failure
First, the fear of failure is different for everyone. How do we define failure?
- Loss of a job.
- Loss of money.
- Loss of love.
- Loss of respect.
Once upon a time, you could expect to land a job, work there for many years and retire with a decent pension. Today, that’s not a realistic expectation. The loss of a job is inevitable so this should be an expectation that is planned for and it’s by no means failure. Embrace the loss of a job as the next step in life and an opportunity for growth.
Money comes and goes. Yes, it’s necessary to a degree and certainly makes life easier when you have ample amounts. Losing it may be an opportunity for growth. Look at Donald Trump!
When a relationship fails, we have an opportunity to look inside ourselves and learn what needs to change. It’s likely there needs to be some behavioural changes. Maybe not as much about how we act towards others but adjusting what we will accept from others.
Respect is a tough one. Give respect to get respect, to and from yourself as much as others. Is the issue respecting yourself and others, or others respecting you? Again, time to look to the root cause and decide what the growth opportunity is. Once we define how the respect was lost, changes can be made to earn it back. Difficult, yes. Impossible, no.
Fear of Success
- Creates high expectations.
- May out grow some friends.
- Family members may resent you.
- I don’t want to be like “those” people.
Success creates high expectations. We feel we must maintain certain productivity and income levels. We have to always have to have the best of everything. We always have to be “on our game”. When we falter and have a bad day, others are watching and often quick to point out the errors. Is being imperfect a failure? No, It’s a chance to learn and grow.
When we achieve success, we sometimes have to put some relationships “on the back burner” or maybe even leave past relationships behind. There will be crabs in your life that you just can’t afford to be exposed to.
Family members don’t resent you. They resent your success because they can no longer afford to do the things you do. Give them the opportunity to participate when you can. Can you invite them to be part of your business?
Why is it that we associate success and money with evil? Yes, there are bad rich people. Just as there are bad poor people. Money and success didn’t make them that way. How you treat people is up to you. I have a friend that is very successful and makes a great deal of money. Her and her partners built an orphanage in Guatemala and she spends four months a year working there with young children. Does her success make her bad?
Embrace success and the change it brings. Use your success to help others, whether by providing financial support or leading them to find their own success.
What are your fears?
Turn and face your fears head on. Where there is foundation, seek a solution that will put your fears to rest. Maybe you need to find another source of income or you need to seek further education. Do that.
No foundation for the fears? By facing them, you now know they can’t hurt you. Change what you are doing or get the education you need. Turn your attention toward the future, allow yourself to experience your beautiful dreams and make them become realities.
Make it a great day!
P.S. What am I thankful for today?
I’m thankful for spring sunshine. I’m thankful for opportunities to grow. I’m thankful for all the people who have touched my life,
What are you thankful for today?