LSD: Love, Sex and Dating

LSD

What is LSD?

I was at Connexus this past Sunday and they were starting a new series by Andy Stanley* called  “The new rules for Love, Sex and Dating”  This should be required viewing for all teenagers, otherwise known as walking hormones!  Rating alert, this video should be considered PG13.

10-28-2010 08;47;20PM_1Andy was probably totally unaware that when the video panned to him, it cut off the screen a couple of times and all that was left in view were the letters LSD.  Was he hinting that love is the drug?  Love can be very exhilarating but just like the high from bad drugs, it can be very depressing when you come down from the initial high.  It takes a lot of work to maintain that high.  Being addicted to love is totally OK as long as you understand the work involved in maintaining the relationship.

Love

Falling in love is easy.  Staying in love takes a lot of work.

In “The Right Person Myth“, Andy talks about how your past affects your future.  I love his statement:  The present will be your past which will be present in your future”.  We all forget that The Slight Edge decisions we make every day will show up again.  Look to Andy’s series on Guard Rails where he talks about something as simple as going for coffee with a person of the opposite sex at work.  That “past” can carry over to your future and take your relationships right off the rails.  Pay attention to your present because it will become your past and it will show up in your future!*

Sex

Let’s not confuse sex and love.  Sex is a physical reaction in response to environmental stimuli.  For married people, when the sex seems to become less frequent or exciting, it’s usually a symptom that something else is wrong.  Sometimes, we miss the symptoms and then find ourselves feeling neglected when it may actually be us that is the one guilty of neglect.

One day, you may be in a new and exciting environment and find yourself attracted to a special person.  You may be spending quality time with someone special and that creates an exciting environment.  If your current relationship has lost its lustre, maybe you need to find out what has changed or needs to be changed.  Do you really need to go find a new relationship because it’s too difficult to fix the existing one?

Too many times, I have seen men leave their wife because their relationship has lost the spark that lit their fire.  Have you ever noticed that if you fan the embers in a fire, it lights up way easier than starting a new fire from scratch?  Fan the embers, light her up and before long, there will be a fire so intense, people will be drawn to the heat and asking how you did it!

Dating

If you are in the dating arena, we all set out to find the right person.  We date one after another, until we finally think we found him or her.  What an exhausting exercise!

I love Andy’s advice here, “become the person you are looking for“.

My personal experience is that I met my wife, the love of my life, when I gave up looking and just decided to be the best person I could be and take what came.  All of a sudden, my wife just appeared!  Seemingly out of nowhere, a gift from God at just the right time in my life.

Watch Andy’s presentation:  The new rules for Love, Sex and Dating

Make it a great day!

Barry

P.S.  What am I thankful for today?  I’m thankful for my beautiful wife.  I’m thankful for opportunities to improve.  I’m thankful for people like Andy Stanley.

What are you thankful for today?

*Andy Stanley is the Lead Minister for North Point Ministries.  North Point Ministries, Inc., was founded in 1995 with the vision of creating churches that un-churched people love to attend. Since its inception, NPM has grown from one church to five in metro-Atlanta and has developed a global network of more than thirty strategic partner churches.

Pivot points. We all have them!

Pivot points are those challenges and/or moments we face throughout our lives that cause us to take inventory and consider which direction to head into next.

Pivot point, birth of a child.Examples of pivot points.

Pivotal moments are usually those times when we are faced with a great loss or the potential of something that could lead to causing us pain.

  • Birth of a child.
  • Death of a child (yes, we experienced that).
  • Job loss (yep, that too).
  • Marital breakup.
  • Mid-life crisis.

This list could go on and on.

Making choices.

When we are faced with a pivot point, we are forced to make a choice.  How will you  interpret the experience?  Catastrophe or opportunity?  Now you have to make some decisions on what to do next.  That choice will lead you to the next pivot point.  Life takes so many turns, there is no way to predict where you will end up.

It’s like when I was a kid and we would all load up in the car.  Dad would start driving and we would each take a turn on which direction to take next.  We never knew where we would up!  Could be the countryside and enjoying the scenery or could be the local dairy for ice cream.  Somehow, I think Dad managed to have us choose the “right” direction!

Like life, it was more about the journey, not the destination.  There was excitement in not knowing where we would end up!

In your business.

Think about this like “chunking”.  Your business is one area of your life.  Looking at that, it too has pivot points.

Let’s say you are in marketing.  In years past, it was about pushing your message out to the masses.  Then along comes social media and not as many people or companies are looking for print ads or TV commercials.  This is the time of attraction marketing.  You have reached another pivot point in your business.  Will you give up and walk away or will you do what it takes to shift your focus to the new way of doing things?

Your business is like each component of your life.  Each comes to different pivot points at different times.

What will you choose?

  • Will you treat every misadventure as catastrophe or opportunity?
  • Will you accept that the result is because of your choice, not what someone else did or said?
  • Are you willing to let God guide you in making your choices?

We are all given free will.  With that comes the responsibility for your actions.  Yes, “stuff” happens.  It’s what you do when you reach that pivot point that makes all the difference.

This video has a great piece on this subject.  Amazing how much of a parallel there is between business principles and the bible!  Listen to how Carey Nieuwhof explains Pivot Points.

 

Make it a great day!

Barry

P.S.  What am I thankful for today?  I’m thankful for open minded people.  I’m thankful for every new opportunity.  I’m thankful for the support of friends and family.

What are you thankful for today?

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