From Step Dad to Father…

To all the estranged Fathers out there…

You’re the example.

Over the years you managed to set the example.  Kindness and understanding.  Respect for the feelings and needs of the kids regardless of your own desire for every moment you can have together.  Civility to the other parents, even though that’s the last thing you wanted to do!  The kids know.

They know you wanted to be there but appreciate the efforts you made to let them have a normal life.

You Did A Great Job!

You couldn’t be there every day but they knew you wanted to be.  I always told them I couldn’t be their father, but I was proud to be Dad when they needed me to be.

Sometimes adult relationships don’t work out.  We all start with great intentions but sometimes, it’s better to part.  When there are children involved, it’s especially painful.  Christmas time really emphasizes the distance.  Just because Father can’t be there physically every moment doesn’t mean they are not there in spirit.

You managed to be kind to Mom and the kids respect that.  As a result, they know you care.

Was it worth it?

You never know how you did until you see them as a parent themselves.  What’s the old cliche?  The proof is in the pudding!

God forbid, their own relationships don’t work but we can only hope they do what is best for their own children.

Absolutely, it was worth it!

Thank you for doing the best you could and having patience with me.

Merry Christmas and make it a great day!


P.S.  What am I thankful for today?  I’m thankful I could help you raise wonderful children.  I’m thankful to share a grand child with you.  I’m thankful I could be there to help pick up the pieces.

What are you thankful for today?

Soda! That’s the problem with kids today!

There was commentary on 680 News out of Toronto this morning (Friday, August 16, 2013) Quoting some statistics about the effect of soda on children and how it makes them aggressive.  There is a piece on CBS news as well.

Is soda really the problem?

Apparently, children who have at least one soda per day are more aggressive than those who don’t.  Those who have four or more per day become really aggressive.  Is soda really the problem or are there other factors at play and we have only measured the one factor in isolation?

Statistics.  The numbers don’t lie!

Well, I agree that the numbers don’t lie.  Statistics can though.  It’s all in how the question is asked that produces the statistics and how those are presented that tells the story you want to tell.  Is it all a lie?  No but it’s not the whole truth either.  Before you ever form an opinion, make sure you know the WHOLE story!

Big children after a little sodaSoda or parenting?

Let’s get back to the soda thing.  Is it the soda that makes children more aggressive or is it the parenting?  When I think about how we raised our kids, they only got soda on special occasions and the odd treat.  They weren’t any more aggressive because of the soda.  Now, when you ask only about children who drink soda, you might get a very different answer.

Why would they be drinking more soda?  Likely because of permissive parents who don’t want to say no and put up with the fight with their children.  My belief is that this permissiveness leads to children having certain expectations and not being willing to accept the word no.  For God’s sake, they are even eliminating the word no from the teachers’ vocabulary in schools now!  And they wonder why dealing with teenagers is becoming so difficult.

So, I ask the question:  Is soda the problem with kids today?

Make it a great day,


P.S.  What am I thankful for today?  I’m thankful for children.  I’m thankful for teachers.  I’m thankful for the right to different opinions.

What are you thankful for today?